In Thy Lovers Arms
by EricTheNorthman
Summary: Eric regains his memory while in a compromising position. He is definitely confused but comes to believe that Sookie must have yielded to him...why else would he be sharing her bed! Rated MA
1. Chapter 1

This is my first fanfic...so please be kind!

I am not sure of what the length of my story will be, I guess I will just see where it goes!

It will mainly go back and forth between Eric and Sookie's POV, starting out with the first chapter being Pam's POV in order to sort of lay out the beginning of the story.

I definitely love the original CH version of the books, but of course there are so many scenes that I am sure many of us have envisioned happening in different ways...so let the FUN begin!

**Lead in:**

The first scene I have chosen to write my own version of is, Eric regaining his memory...but of course this all comes to be while in a rather compromising position. Pam is loyal to her Master, and has no choice to take matters in to her own hands when opportunity presents itself. She can not believe her and Chow's luck when the witch Hallow is standing right before their eyes. "Master will not be happy that he was not present for this, but we must act immediately!"

Also, I would say that it is safe to assume that there will be times that I will make reference to certain events that happened prior to the start of my story as though some of it had still taken place.

Hope you all enjoy!!


	2. Chapter 2

In Thy Lovers Arms

Chapter 1

Pam's POV

Before today It had not even begun to register how afraid for my Masters well being I had become. I was terrified he would never again be the big bad viking vampire Sheriff, that I have always known him to be.

I am ashamed to admit that I felt pity on him to see him practically cowering on the floor wrapping himself around Sookie's feet. He himself would have staked any 1000 year old vampire showing such weakness at a mere human's feet!

However, I believe that as of this moment my maker is back in his right mind…I am positive I felt the change within my very core and he will be contacting me any time now.

"well Chow, looks like Master will be coming home!" I all but whispered.

"I'll just be glad when all is back to normal, do you think he'll come back right away?"

Chow replied.

"Of course, he is Sheriff." Nothing more needed to be said as far as Pam was concerned.

"I will say nothing more on the subject after this, but do you deny what we seemed to witness between our Master and Miss Stackhouse? Do you not think that there may be some issues?"

Chow reluctantly spoke freely.

I can't remember when I last laughed so freely. My Master was sure to have his hands full over the next possibly very long while. "Oh, I have no doubt Chow darling. We will be in for one hell of a ride. ERIC style! Mark my words, he will be impossible to live with for quite some time."

To think it was pure luck that would put Hallow within arms reach. I whispered those few precious words that would allow all the witches spells cast to be null and void the moment she her last breath left her body. As this was pure coincidence I had no weapons but my two hands, and I simply reached out and tore the head from her shoulders!

Of course, Eric won't be happy that he was not here but I am sure he will be happy all the same. I intend to make sure that there are plenty fangbangers of his preference at his disposal for his return. They all might just resemble Sookie in some way…oh this will be fun!

It has been over an hour and still no call? Hmm…for a moment that fear has crept back into my mind. I slowly dial his number…ringing, ringing come on Eric…

"Pam" YES I hear it in his voice he is back…but there is something wrong, This is obvious.

"All is well Master?" I try to contain my emotions. Fear, relief, happiness, and much more.

"Yes Pam, all is well. I will call you when I am ready, it should be very soon. We have much to discuss."

There was a definate edge to his voice.

"Chow, I will be in the Masters office. I want to make sure everything is in order, you will be in charge for bit as I will be going to bring him home very shortly!"

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Just a brief note: I, of course do not own these characters there the property of CH. I will just be enjoying the use of them for a while.


	3. Chapter 3

**In Thy Lovers Arms**

**Chapter 2**

**Sookie's POV**

My day started out about as normal as my days ever are. It was my day off so I indulged and slept till well after 2pm. I was greatful to not be feeling quite so tender today, as Eric had hinted at trying something new today! Hmm…I can only wonder. He likes to tease me a little in regards to my lack thereof experience wise…that's one thing that's make me see a small part of what I like to call the real Eric, Sheriff of area 5, Eric.

I like "My Eric" a little better. I feel bad saying that of course knowing that on at least two occasions the sheriff 'Eric' had been willing to give me his blood 'to heal' and I happen to know for a fact that Eric being who he is has never shared his blood with anyone but his 'child'. Pam had told me that it can become a weakness to him…whatever that means so it's not something he would normally ever do.

I have always felt a strong attraction to him before he lost his memory as well. I don't know maybe it was the bad boy image or something, but it use to shame me that even in Bill's presence my heart would race at the sight of Eric. And make no mistake, Eric knew and he would just leer at me. It had only happened on two occasions so far, but I had heard Eric's thoughts. Which never happens because they are voids to me, I don't hear a thing normally.

The worst part about it was that one of those times he was thinking about how he knew I was attracted to him, something about my heart racing and then he actually thought about how he could smell the lust between my legs! That was probably the most humiliation I had ever felt in my life. Never the less he was correct and if I had only known the pure God he was between the sheets and everywhere else, I don't know if I could of denied him!

He still maintains that I am the best he has ever had. HA…how would he know, memory loss remember! He certainly is the best I have ever had, not that that can account for much since I have only had one other lover, Bill. I can definitely say that he is certainly also the best I will ever have…did I mention he is a God! Mmm…absolutely delish!

"OH CRAP" I said aloud to myself, I totally forgot about my own special little treat I had planned for Eric. Well if I was being honest it was certainly for my own benefit as well. One of the few negative feeling I had in regards to being with a vampire, was that I never had the opportunity to sleep next to them and possibly awake in each others arms.

Part of me thinks I am being a little silly and he will never agree to this or at least not feel safe enough. I had promised myself that it will not bother me if he can not agree to what I want, and I truly will not be insulted I mean it is about his own safety.

* * *

I left the house without showering, just a light freshening up. I can get to the shower as soon as I finish. I was quite excited, Eric and I will never be able to wake up cuddling on a bright sunny morning with sun shinning in on us but we could sure as hell spend the day in bed together!

It's my intention to stay up as late as I possibly can so I can sleep next to that gorgeous ass all day if he'll let me.

I bought the darkest do-it-yourself window tinting product, black room darkening blinds, and the thickest blackest curtains I could come across. "This should do it" I whispered to no one in particular. I honestly have no idea if it will be enough to block enough sun from my room that he would feel safe enough, but I kept thinking even if it was only for one day, I would so love it!

It's not like I am being naïve, I mean I know at one point he will get his memory back and go home. Leaving me alone once again, but I have resolved to let myself have what little happiness I could hold on to for now.

I finally finished installing everything close to 5:00 it took much less time then I thought it would, and I could not believe the difference. My room was in complete darkness not one bit of light, I couldn't see my hand in front of my face! This just might work.

Eric would be up around 6:30 so I still had plenty of time to eat and shower.

As I was getting dressed I could hear my glorious viking moving around in my old room where he stays in the hidey-hole that my ex Bill had made for himself. This was gonna be fun…he had agreed to watch Twilight with me tonight. I can only imagine his reaction to that, he had taken to watching my tapes of Buffy and was thinking how unrealistic that was. I think I should apply some shimmer to his face before he awakes tomorrow, I know he'll get a real laugh out that!

I so love to see the laughter touch his eyes, that's one other thing he has in common with the real Eric. He truly loves to laugh and we seemed to get each other. Bill and I never did, he didn't have much of a sense of humour. Even when I was attacked by the manaid, it seemed like Eric and I shared a few little personal jokes even when I thought I would die!

Sometimes I feel like we were meant to be together, like we were drawn to one another. Oh well enough of that this will all be over soon enough. How sad that makes me, yet I will not let myself forget it.

"Hello lover" He always has such a smooth seductive purr to his voice when he would greet me with this endearment.

"mmm…how are feeling today baby?" I know it's not like a whole lot changes from the start to the end of their day time stupor but I always feel the need to ask.

"Much better now" he says as he pulls me in for one of his soft lusciously sexy kisses. I swear I could just eat him up right now till dawn, but no way we are having our movie night!

I tell him he is on his own for a shower, of course he's not too happy but hey he can't always have things his way. it's not like we won't have hours left still. Last night with exception of a few breaks for my benefit (Hey…I am mortal you know!) he ravished me for over 3 hours.

I met him in the bedroom to discuss my little plan for the day time hours when I heard the shower turn off. Yum…right on time for the perfect view of his hot muscular ass!

"Sookie, why does something seem off about the room?"

"Well that's exactly what I came to discuss with you. What do you think about being able to spend the day sleeping and cuddling all day, my handsome viking?"

"Pardon, What do you mean? Eric asks.

"Well I had a thought the other day and went shopping today and bought all this stuff and fixed it up. it's as black as night in here during the day, have a look at it yourself."

He spent a few minutes looking it over before saying that he couldn't believe everything I do for him.

"Baby, I can tell you I have perfectly selfish reasons for doing half of this stuff. I very much want to wake up in your arms tomorrow, but I would totally understand if you have reservations…"

"Absolutely not lover, I trust you and if you say it is safe and no sunlight will reach me here. Then I would love nothing more then to spend my day next to you. Your brilliant lover, you never cease to amaze me! "

"Well that's settled then, so are you ready to see some real vampires?" I teased.

Before I could blink he had me in his arms and we were on our way to the kitchen.

* * *

Eric wasn't exactly pleased with the whole sparkly vampire thing, but he actually enjoyed the movie and plans to read the books. Personally, I think this is only because I talk so much about it.

All in all it was a nice night, we laughed and cuddled Eric drank his blood and I my ginger ale and I munched on popcorn. We watched an episode of True Blood, which was more his style…no surprise there.

He was such a gentleman all evening that I decided it was my turn to take the initiative. I would be quite the little seductress tonight. I left the room to get rid of the dishes when I returned I climbed onto the opposite end of the couch so I could crawl my way across to Eric. I knew with this angle that he had full view of my breasts (which I might add are one of my best assets and certainly something to be quite proud of.

I mounted Eric, straddling his lap he was instantly hard. There would be nothing he could do to hide it considering the thin pajama bottoms he wore and did I mention he had been blessed by the Gods with an a huge cock. I began running my fingers through his hair and kissing him softly our lips barely touching at first, as I lightly started nipping at his lower lip.

He had left his shirt off so I lightly started kissing across his jaw line, down his neck and chest till I came to his nipples. Now I began increasing the pressure as _I nipped at his nipples, _I could see my own reaction to my actions. My center was hot and wet, as if he read my mind his hand reached down between us and stroked at my nub before slowly inserting first one finger and then a second.

My head was spinning in seconds…I pulled away and slid to the floor on my knees in front of my Viking God. He helped me slide his pants off his waste and down to the floor around his ankles.

There was already a slightly sticky sheen to his tip and I used my tongue to lick around his head before sliding him into my mouth. I sucked and nipped and licked and wrapped my fingers around the base of his cock, I could never take all of him so I massaged and gently tugged. I could feel him swell and pulse I knew he was almost there, I wanted to taste him but he wasn't having that not yet anyway!

He firmly grabbed me by the waste and pulled me onto his lap, he ripped my panties off and raised me just enough to place himself at my entrance pausing only long enough for me to respond on my own lowering myself onto him.

I started to slowly rotate my hips grinding into his crotch I needed to feel him buried inside of me…"Ohh Sookie, your so wet! I can never get enough of you, you have bewitched me, body and soul! I am ruined I tell you, no other will be able to have me!"

Before I even knew what was going on he had us standing behind the couch and was telling me to bend over. He thrust his cock into me with only as much speed and pressure as I could handle, which was quite a bit by this point. As he kissed and licked down my neck and shoulder he reached down between us to gently rub my throbbing nub. He slowed his pace pulling almost all the way out and slowly sliding all the way back in…he knew how to drive me mad and filled my entirely.

I begged him for more "Please, Please Eric…faster, harder bring me home baby!" God I was so wet I could feel myself dripping. He brought his one hand to pinch at my nipple while the other held my hip. I reached between us to replace the finger he had removed from my nub…gently rubbing getting them as wet as possible. Then I reached that same hand back to place my fingers in his mouth, he growled and moaned and sucked and licked my fingers clean.

I began to writh and moan I could feel my completion coming up on me like a hurricane "cum for me Eric please, fill me up…yes yes yes"

He thrust into me one last time I felt him swell and pulse and then we both released together. God I loved this man. What? Love? All I could think before we hit the floor in a tangled mess was that I was glad I didn't say that out loud!

* * *

*****Again of course these characters are owned by Charlaine Harris and only ours to enjoy from time to time.*****

**Ok…so things are obviously gonna heat up more as the progresses and of course we'll be watching for Eric's memory to return!**


	4. Chapter 4

Just wanted to thank everyone for the reviews…as I have said I am new to this so I am just plucking away, hoping to find my groove! I plan to try to post a chapter or two daily.

Also, I apologise in advance for those who may be offended there is a little more language used in this chapter.

**In Thy Lovers Arms**

**Eric's POV**

I have no idea how this woman does this to me…I am Vampire. I may not remember who I am but I do know that I do not collapse from sheer exhaustion! Yet here we lay where we fell to the floor our legs tangled and clutching at each other. Of course on my part I am simply staying put where I want to be, embracing my Sookie. Somehow I had just reacted to her, but for a brief second I had lost control.

I gently picked her up and carried her to what would be our room for this night. I was quite looking forward to staying next to my lover through my daytime rest.

"Your exhausted my lover, please rest for a while. You will need all your energy in a short while." Panic briefly crossed her face, but mostly I saw excitement, lust, anticipation…and something else, though I could not quite make out what that was. It just sort of felt like a warmth lingering between us.

"Mmm…k baby" was all she murmured as she cupped my cheek with her palm, and softly brushed her lips across my own.

Well I will probably give her half an hour…then she is all mine again. This woman drives me insane just thinking of her little stunt earlier to drive me over the edge. Touching herself, wetting her fingers with her own sweet juices and putting them to my lips…I am rock hard again at just the thought of it, my little vixen!

I must have been in what Sookie likes to call my down time because I didn't see it coming, Sookie was suddenly straddling my hips licking and kissing her way up my chest and throat to my ear. She seductively whispers to me "Times up honey…time to claim your prize!

She continued forward grinding her crotch against my hard bulge, then slowly slid down my legs -ahh she was so wet and hot- she began stroking and teasing my length making short quick strokes with her tongue only briefly making contact.

"Mmm… Eric, looks like Mr. Happy wants to come out and play" she taunts me still stroking and gently pulling on my length. "It's a pity he'll only take part if I say so" she murmurs breathlessly.

She says these things as though she believes she is in control…

By this time I am raring to go, menacing growls escape my lips. I flip her on her back and she spreads her legs obligingly If it's Mr. Happy she wants then it's Mr. Happy she will get…I slide one finger down pressing against her folds to ensure she is ready to take me. She is. I ready myself at her entrance and slide in to the hilt full force. It is my intention to take the few minutes we need to release then take my time pleasuring my lover before the night is through.

We released together a few moments later with mind blowing force.

We attempt to adjust ourselves to be better situated on the bed. As she half sat up she scooted herself further across the bed, both pulling herself seductively with her hands grasping the sheets behind her and pushing with her heels as her legs were bend at the knees one behind the other. All this while slightly biting at her lower lip…yes still trying to hold on to some control!

I ravish her with soft kisses that soon turn hard and forceful in all the excitement. Trailing down her jaw to her throat where I linger briefly. I kiss my way down her luscious curves making strategic stops to pay proper homage to her entire body. I reach my hand down between us gently rotating it on her swollen nub dropping down to slide my fingers through her wet folds.

She twitches and thrusts lifting off the bed towards me. I find myself securing her hips to the bed while she writhes and moans from above me. I begin to lick and suck lapping up all her wetness, my tongue is now buried deep within her folds and I slowly bring one hand down to play with her nub.

The heat is rolling off of her now. My fingers and mouth are both equally busy pleasuring her sweet hot center. She is now crying out in her own sweet pleasure while I continue to emit low snarls and growling in ecstasy.

I continue in an escalating tempo, and when I look up our eyes meet. For the briefest moment I finally recognise that other look in her eyes that I had seen earlier, and I know instantly what it is because my own eyes I am sure share a mirror image…it's love.

These thoughts are crossing my mind as my tongue is still buried in her lapping up every last drop of her sweet juices, she's dripping wet for me.

What? What the fuck! I freeze I am stock still for the briefest second, well maybe about 3 seconds. I know she see's something flash across my face but she doesn't mention it really just cries out for me to take her "oh god Eric…ahh what is it baby come on make me cum, I need you, I need you inside of me. What are you waiting for, claim what is yours!"

I feel her body jolt as she wiggles and bounces beneath me. My mind is still saying what the fuck, I have no idea how I have come to be here and in this specific intimate position. The last thing I can remember is being in my office with Pam and Chow and one of them fucking witches wanting to bed me while trying to rip me off!

I yanked myself back into the moment and continue lapping up her sweet, sweet juices. I mean come on I am Eric fucking Northman, Sheriff of area 5. I may not have a clue as to what the hell is going on, but I did tell her once that I am nothing if not opportunistic! All this aside I am afraid to speak one word thinking I must be having one hell of a dream and do not want to pull myself from it.

As much as I love tasting her she did tell me to claim what is mine…I slowly turn my head to the side (not breaking eye contact till the last possible second) nuzzling her inner thigh, licking at the throbbing vain I can feel beneath her flesh . My fingers now buried in her moving steadily, faster and faster and then I bit.

Her pleasure center is pulsing and tightening around my fingers…her fingers are angrily grabbing at my hair attempting to pull me to her . I am also nothing if not gracious so of course I'll oblige.

I slowly and cautiously climb towards her expecting at any moment that sassy , stubborn, argumentative, yet sexy little minx will tell me to get the fuck off her bed! I have to avert my eyes I can see that she senses something, but what? Hell I don't even know what the fuck is happening here but I am sure as fuck not backing down.

I don't hesitate for even a second I already know she is ready for me. I thrust into her like my life depends on it, after a moment I know I am being too rough. I slow it down pulling almost all the way out and sliding back in over and over…suddenly I am mesmerized by her sheer beauty, her luscious curves and gorgeous breasts. I am unable to tear my gaze from her eyes, before I know it I find I am resting most of my wait on my forearms and both our hands are clasped together at either side of her beautiful, perfect face. I feel like my head is spinning as I look down upon this goddess below me and I realize what is happening…we are making love…

What the fuck…yes I am back to that! As much as it surprises me I couldn't be happier that we have finally come to our mind blowing completion. I couldn't even bring myself to bite down and taste her at my own final completion.

I roll off of her and onto my side finally feeling more in shock then anything. Sookie curls herself up onto the crook of my shoulder drawing small circles through my chest hair. I continue to stare in disbelief at her. I have no idea what to say to her so only say this "Well, I must say it is nice of you to finally yield to me Sookie"

She giggles slightly and says "Now your just starting to sound like your old self, that'll be the day Eric."

I don't want to let on that I still have no clue what is going on so I am glad to notice it will be dawn in a few short hours maybe she won't take offence if I try to head home now. I bend down and kiss her cheek and start to leave her bed saying that dawn is near I must go.

"Don't be silly Eric did you forget the windows are blacked out? We get to spend the day wrapped in each others arms! Now lay back and rest I'll see your gorgeous ass, and well that gracious plenty at dusk!" She says as she plants a very sensual kiss on my still lips

For the love of all that is holy…what the hell universe did I some how end up in.

I can hear my cell ringing from somewhere outside the room. I quietly slide out of bed to find my phone. Thank god it's Pam.

"Pam"

There's not much said just that I will call her when I am ready for her to come, part of me would like to stay till dusk to figure things out with Sookie but there is much I need to know before hand.

I spend about 20 minutes spooning Sookie till I can tell by her breathing that she is finally out. Then I get dressed and call Pam back.

"Come now, I am ready."

"Yes Master, I'll be there in 20"

I do the only thing I can so Sookie does not wake up not knowing where I am. I leave a note on her bedside table.

My Dearest Sookie,

I have important matters to deal with this night, please forgive my hasty retreat.

Yours,

E

***Again, these characters are owned by Charlaine Harris and only ours to borrow.***


	5. Chapter 5

In Thy Lovers Arms

Sookie POV

I awake to the darkness, my body somewhat stiff and a little more tender then usual. I am a little disappointed that I am not wrapped in my lovers arms.

I let out a slight giggle at referring to him with his own pet name for me. I can't help but think of how quickly things can change.

I had long ago built a protective wall around me, others have attempted to get through with no success of course. Then this past week something changed, the wall had been slowly crumbling down before I was even aware it was gone. Somehow I had never even put up a fight, I just let him through.

Of course that would not have been the case with the real Eric, just my Eric. At that thought my body suddenly ached for him, I rolled over into the darkness my body seeking the comfort of his touch.

My breath caught and I stiffened, the bed was empty of all but myself. My eyes flickered to the bright digits of my clock, it was 2:23pm.

Something wasn't right, I flicked my lamp on and glanced around the room. Nothing out of sorts, maybe Eric was just not able to rest here. I jumped up and ran for the hidey hole in my old room, just a peek and I will feel better.

I felt like I had been kicked in the gut, he wasn't there! I was crippled by the pain in my chest my heart, unable to move or stand. My body shook so violently I thought I 'd be sick.

I was finally able to get off my knees I hurried through the house. Nothing seemed amiss, I was so confused and I couldn't even call Pam till after sunset. That thought also terrified me, if something happened to him would they hurt me?

I stumbled back to my room. Seeing myself in the mirror I realized I was still naked, I pulled the first things I found out of my dresser. Slim fitting hip hugger jeans and a fuschia coloured tank top.

I noticed his t-shirt lying on the floor where he had tossed it. I picked it up and sat on the edge of the bed, I could smell him as though he were still in the room. It made my heart ache like someone had just wrapped a strong fist around it and squeezed.

As my eyes absently wandered the room I caught sight of a note on my bed side table. I snatched it up in haste and read the words in the elegant script.

******************************************************************

My Dearest Sookie

I have important matters to deal with this night, please forgive my hasty retreat.

Yours,

E

******************************************************************

What the hell…this doesn't even sound like my Eric. Something is definitely wrong, This might not even be from him. How would I even know I've never seen his hand writing.

I felt as though I would go mad any moment now. It is just after 8:00pm and I am almost at Fangtasia. I had decided that the best way to deal with this was head on, go right to Pam and tell her he's gone I have lost him!

For all I know he could be there with Pam, but it seems unlikely. He would have called by now, he would have told me he is safe knowing how worried I would be.

I had decided about 2 hours ago that there just wasn't any choice in the matter, If I didn't hear from anyone I had to drive to Shreveport. I had tucked the note from my table into my pocket and left the house almost an hour ago.

I know I looked like crap I was lucky if I had spent maybe 30 minutes out of the last almost 6 hours not crying. So my face was red and swollen, what did I care I wasn't looking to impress anyone.

I was somewhat composed approaching the door that is until I caught Pam's eye. I fell to pieces, my hands were to my face immediately and I was sobbing uncontrollably.

"I'm sorry Pam, I am so sorry…"

I don't know if she understood one word out of my mouth, she just wrapped one arm around me and pulled into her shoulder as she guided me through the bar. She placed me in Eric's office, which just managed to increase my sobs. I didn't even care what might happen to me now.

"I'll be right back Sookie. Just have a seat and please stop leaking, you know how I hate that."

She came back into the office with a bottle of water and some tissue.

"Pam, he's gone and I know if you don't find him soon what will happen to me. I just don't know what happened, this note was left but it really says nothing."

She had an amused look on her face as I tried to speak through my tears…of course she was amused thinking of all of the ways to torture me!

"I am so worried Pam, how could someone take him without me knowing. I never left the house, do you think it could be the witches…?" I was rambling now I know, but I was just so upset and on the verge of hysteria.

I heard the door open behind me and turned to see my Eric filling the doorway so completely. I gasped as my heart jumped into my throat and I ran over to him. I placed my hands on his arms and looked him over, he looked fine.

"Your ok…thank god!" I breathed

My legs suddenly felt like rubber, I felt weak and fell to my knees crying and wrapped my arms around Eric's legs.

I felt Eric's hands prying mine from his legs and pulling me to my feet while he told Pam to 'leave us'. Leave us…I thought to myself that sounds too much like 'Eric' Eric. I was coming to some realizations very slowly but wasn't fully there yet.

He set me on the edge of his desk as he stood close between my legs. An intense silence filled the air surrounding us. It felt like forever as I waited expecting him to devour me. It never came he just pulled me to his chest kissed my forehead lightly and released me.

He gestured to the chair in front of his desk before taking his own seat behind his desk.

"Well your quite out of sorts Sookie, it is nice to see your so concerned with my well being."

"Why wouldn't I be Eric?" I asked uncertain where this conversation was going.

"As you can see I am in fine form." He said leering at me

We bantered back and forth like this for a few moments, I was learning a little from him. He was obviously back to himself. When I realized that I felt a soft tug at my heart, it was over I was all alone again.

It's not like there could be anything with this Eric, yes he's sexy as hell and he has been helpful with me at times but that was always in hopes of sleeping with me. Then all the pieces began falling into place, I decided to test out my theory.

"This must be hard for you Eric, losing your memory not knowing who you are. Just to get it all back and yet not have any memory of the time you spent not being yourself." I stated rather then asked.

He just raised those provocative eyebrows at me as he realized that two could play his game, and I wasn't budging. He had no idea just how much we shared during his time with me. Those were secrets I was willing to keep. Why should he have the power to break what was left of my heart.

I sighed, smiled and met his eyes. He was looking at me as though he had seen something flash across my face and he wanted in on the secret. Forget it buddy, not gonna happen!

"I would like you to fill me in on some our time together Sookie, if you don't mind."

"That's not possible tonight Eric, I am quite tired. I need to shower I haven't eaten and I have to call Sam, so maybe another time."

I needed to get the hell out of here in order to figure out just how much I would tell him. I never even gave him the chance to respond.

"Well I am glad everything worked out for you, I really need to be going so I will see you later." I gave him the best most sincere smile I could muster as I walked out of his office not once looking back.

The drive home was a long one, I somehow still had tears to cry. I pulled over once afraid I would have an accident but I calmed myself by thinking how it would be easier doing it this way on my own terms. I showered, had some dinner and called Sam. I decided to take tomorrow night off work for myself then jump right back into normal everyday life after that, he was fine with that.

I watched True Blood, which of course made me think of Eric. Then I cried myself to sleep on my couch. I woke up at 2:00 in the morning and dragged my ass to my bed, which of course still smelled strongly of Eric…

And I cried.

~ Probably will not be one of my better chapters. I was a little torn on how much I wanted to reveal here. You will notice of course that Sookie is not quite aware of exactly when Eric got his memory back, she seems to think she has the upper hand here.~

***These characters are owned by Charlaine Harris and we all just borrow them to create our own versions of her wonderful stories.***


	6. Chapter 6

In Thy Lovers Arms

Eric POV

I was quite agitated by the time Pam showed up. I still do not know how much time has gone by, it could have been yesterday, last week or even last year for all I knew. How long have I been here in Sookie's house, how did I come to be here, how long have we been intimate for! I can not remember what a human headache is suppose to feel like but my head wants to explode right now.

"Master…I am so happy to see you, are you ready?"

"Of course you can explain some things on our way, I feel we should leave now."

I knew I wanted to be briefed before seeing Sookie again, so I had no interest in discussing this at her kitchen table. I could smell myself all over her house, very strongly indeed. Her bedroom and living room and even the bathroom were the strongest. The kitchen was strange as it smelled so strongly of bleach and other cleansers which was not right. Her kitchen usually smells of human foods and just…well lived in I guess.

One thing I was sure of was that we did very much so have sex, I couldn't help but smirk at that thought. She was amazing even in my shocked state. I was slightly distressed thinking of the feeling I felt. Love…sorry but Eric Northman loves no human woman. I admit to having strong feelings, more attraction. heavy lust.

I also know that Sookie will be very angry when she realizes when my memory returned. In all fairness I was quite confused myself in that moment, and have always made my intentions pretty clear to her. I want her and she knows this quite well. Of course that does not excuse my actions, there is nothing to be done about that now.

"Your awfully quiet Master, what do you remember? Do you have any questions?" Pam asked

"You have no idea Pam, I remember every part of my life up until being in my office with you Chow and the fucken witch. How did I come to be at Sookie's?"

"Oh my…I wasn't expecting this Eric. Hmm…where to start. Well I guess with the obvious."

Pam went on tell me about how Chow had attacked the witch during the meeting and it seemed that there had been a spell cast within the witch if she died by our hands and I had suddenly disappeared out of thin air. She had no clue where I was till Sookie called after 2:00am New Years day asking if they were missing anything.

"She's quite clever that one. She asked me if we were missing something, then if I still had a master I owed fealty to. She was protective before she let me see you!"

That left me feeling warm, then pissed again. I detest having feelings, I had said that to her once.

"And then." I hedged her on

"She said she would keep you safe for the night, and we came to see you the following night. You were already quite attached to her, you wouldn't let her leave your side Eric. You sat on the floor at her feet."

She smirked at this having a little too much fun. Though she continued on with the details. I had been there for nearly a week, a week of just Sookie and me for the most part. That is a very interesting thought.

Next she went on to tell me that she only seen me twice while I stayed with Sookie because they did not want to draw attention to where I was.

I was a little surprised to learn that I now owe Sookie $30 000, surprised because it was really not like her to ask for anything like that. What did not surprise me was that it was her brother that demanded this only he wanted $50 000 and I am sure he would try to get his hands on some of that. The payment was to be to keep me safe, well, and hidden all of which seems to have happened since I am still here.

"Give her the $50 000 Pam, I am safe and well as you can see."

"As you wish Master, I will have the check ready for tomorrow evening, would you like me to deliver it personally or have it sent to her?"

"I will take care of that I still need to speak with her."

Pam spent a few more minutes informing me of everything else. Sookie's brother has been missing since the day after I started my stay with her. That must have her quite upset he is a let down as brothers go but he is her family. Pam has killed the witch Hallow who was responsible for my curse, she also acquired her spell book that has many dog eared pages.

I am certain I am not going to like finding out what lies behind my curse, the look on Pam's face as she tells me she believes she has found it in the book tells me as much. Last she tells me that all is well in our world. My business interests are all in check, there has been no contact from the royals therefore no one else is aware of the situation.

"Pam, what do you know about my….ah relationship with Sookie?"

"Not much Eric, all I can tell you is that when I was at the house you were glued to her, both of you were very close and protective. You seemed very comfortable, and were quite needy and scared at first. It was very unsettling I have never seen you even close to that, not ever."

She seemed to hesitate before continuing, "Master, I must say that if you do ever recover your memory of this time, you will most definitely not be happy with your person. Please remember that you were cursed and not at all yourself."

"From what little knowledge I have Pam, there are some parts of this little adventure that I will not regret."

"I imagine so, the last time I was there I could smell you all over her." she replied smirking her ass off.

"I didn't tell her about my memory yet, I left a note so she will not wonder where I am. I don't feel right leaving as I did but I also do not have any idea of the situation, I needed to deal with the aftermath of the curse before I concern myself with personal matters." I scowled to myself

Sookie takes nothing lightly, and I know she does not take up with just anyone. So there must have been a shift along the way and it kills me not to know what it was. Did I offer her things, or make promises to her. These thoughts and more will drive me mad, this I know.

Pam is pulling into Fangtasia, which is closed now but she said some employees are here still to celebrate I guess. She has also had some blood bags hang around for a bit. It excites me slightly knowing full well that the fangbangers are far more willing to do things most ladies either won't or it will take too long for them to be comfortable with, without glamour that is.

There are two fangbangers in my office more then willing to please me when I arrive, but I have more important matters like getting at the witches book and going over some paperwork for the bar. I send the two voluptuous blondes on their way hesitantly, as I did not quite finish with Sookie once my conscience took over. I am not known to have one so she must have truly gotten under my skin.

"I have left it open to what I believe pertains to you master, it is mentioned about not knowing who you are, being lost and vulnerable. The last you will want to see for yourself."

I am not sure what to make of the rest, supposedly it was a spell that I would find my way 'home to my true love, but never really be able to fully enjoy the benefits' Apparently the witch was at least a little sentimental. Who knew that Sookie's house would be home to me.

"Did you find love master?" Pam managed to look both smug and completely serious at the same time.

Love, I know that was one of my first thoughts when my memory returned. Do I love Sookie Stackhouse? I really do not know.

"Be serious Pam."

Fuck! I need to go home, I need to think away from all others.

"I am going home Pam, make sure everything is secure before you leave. Good night."

"yes, master. Will you be here tomorrow?"

"Of course"

I was home 15 minutes later, and I still had a little time before dawn. I stripped down and slid under the sheets. I can't help but think about Sookie, I find myself wishing she were here with me then hating myself for that same thought. I decide I need to give it a few days, feel it out and go from there. I'll go into any battle a strong warrior and always prevail, but give me one sexy little blond telepathic Sookie Stackhouse and I feel a sense of fear that I do not ever remember feeling in all my existence.

I went into my daytime rest reliving my first moments back to myself. I am instantly hard seeing myself between her legs…crude I know but it is the first memory I have. I am still as sure as the day I met her that she will be mine, only now I find myself wanting to be hers as well.

When I open my eyes it is after 6:00 pm. My first thought of course wondering what Sookie is up to. I can sense that she seems quite upset, maybe about her brother. It certainly shouldn't be about me, I left her a note which is certainly more then I would have done a month ago. She is worried, scared, sad and lonely. Her feelings have never meant so much to me. The whole time I have spent showering, feeding and dressing I have been trying to figure out every small emotion that seeps through to me. This is too frustrating…I tell myself that is enough, snap the hell out of it. She is just one woman, you have had thousands!

I take my time before heading to fangtasia. I stop to have flowers sent to Sookie, just a little thank you note attached. I would not even consider to presume that anything has changed. What is it she had said r- Now your starting to sound like your old self…that'll be the day Eric.- So she has not fully given herself to me, but that will come.

As I entered the bar shortly after 8pm, I could hear Sookie she was on the verge of hysterics. Rattling on about losing me, how could someone have taken me. She never left me alone. I had blocked her out earlier annoyed with myself for allowing her to invade every thought I had so I hadn't sensed her being so close. It would have been nice to prepare for the mess I was walking into but again, my own fault.

I opened my office door and stepped in, I was not prepared for what I saw. Sookie looked horrible she had been crying so much her face was red and swollen, she was scared to death. Though the moment she sensed me there she immediately calmed. She came to me and grabbed my arms looking up and down my body, I didn't know what to do I just stood there looking down at her.

"Your ok…thank god!" Was all she said before sinking to the floor at my feet clutching my legs and sobbing.

I briefly looked helplessly at Pam, who of course just shrugged so I commanded her to leave us, while I was gently taking her hands from my legs and helping her to stand. She didn't feel steady so I set her on the edge of my desk while I stood in front of her, neither of us spoke, we just looked at each other before I pulled her in to kiss her forehead.

She seemed better now, I gestured for her to take a seat in front of my desk while I sat down in my chair. We talked for a few minutes, only each of us seemed to be pumping the other for information. Not the way I would want our first conversation to go.

Part way through her eyes seemed to be telling me something she surely didn't want me know. I could sense something from her that I never have before. Dishonesty…she was not out right lying to me but she intends to keep something from me. I have been trying so hard to read her that I slipped myself. It's obvious with her last statement that she knows I do not recall my time at her house.

Without her even having to say it I can see that she is planning to keep our intimacy from me. She feels proud, clever and witty right now. I believe we are at the start of an enticing little game of cat and mouse and she surly thinks she is the cat…not likely my dear Sookie, you are most definitely on the losing end of this one. I am at least aware we were intimate, and from the smell of her house it was often and in almost every room!

I do try to convince her to tell me a little about our time together but she's not budging. She makes her excuses to leave. Waving me off like some annoying friend she needs to get away from. I certainly could have caught up to her with her payment for taking care of me, but again I am opportunistic and it will give me another reason to see her since she ran off so quick.

I sit smiling to myself, which of course quickly disappears as my mind wonders back to the mess I walked in on. Seeing her at my feet like that was actually unsettling. It does give me a little insight as to her feeling for me. Which in turn leaves me smiling again.

I finish up some paper work, scheduling and payroll. Then a sadness rushes through me, it almost makes me want to go to her but she wouldn't want to see me right now. She should be home in the next 20 minutes or so, I am sure she'll be fine. One thing I know for sure now as well is that she is going to fight me harder then ever, but as I said there is no battle I will not face.

"Eric, do you think you will enthral the vermin tonight it has been sometime since they have seen you!"

"Yes Pam, I am just finishing up the payroll. Not to worry I know my place and so should you." I could tell by the look on her face that she got my warning. I decide who does what and when.

It is now after 2:00am, and I am overcome with such grief from Sookie. It almost feels like my own. My god Sookie, go to sleep before you kill me I suffer enough from my own. I know she is still not ready for me to comfort her. She is suffering from a such severe feelings of loss, despair, loneliness, such sadness. Unfortunately I happen to be the cause right now not the cure.

I leave the bar just after 3:00am and I fly to Sookie's it's much faster and I won't be seen this way. I just want to check on her. She is finally sleeping peacefully, I enter through the window in her old room I just want to see her and she has something covering her own bedroom window. She looks like an angel asleep in her bed, she seems to be clutching something I lean in to see. If I had a beating heart this is when it would have skipped if not stopped beating entirely, in her arms is what must have been one of my shirts while I stayed here my scent is all over it!

I lean in close to take in her scent, and brush my lips over the top of her head. She pushed one of her pillows to the side, I pick it up to smell her on it. It's stronger then almost anything else she could own because she lays her head on it for so many hours every night. Suddenly a thought occurs to me, I swiftly grab an extra pillow form her old room and place it by her head and I leave with her pillow in hand.

At dawn I will sleep with the God's, with her heavenly scent!

***Again just playing with Charlaine Harris' characters***


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Just a quick note: Sorry it took so long to post a new chapter…I really had a lot of difficulty moving on with this one for some reason. As I said I am new to the whole writing thing, so as they say maybe I just lost my muse as far as this story goes.**

**Looks like it's back though so here goes nothing!**

**In Thy Lovers Arms**

**Sookie POV**

I find myself waking with tears in my eyes…I can only vaguely recall the previous nights dream. I had chosen to say good bye to Eric, Sheriff Eric that is as he will never be my Eric. In my dream it never bothered him one bit, that hurt for more reasons then I care to admit.

I roll over stretching out, hugging my comforter to me. Is it possible to hurt so much I feel as though my heart is breaking, the smell of his skin lingers on my bedding and all through my room. I can hardly breath.

Something happened for the very first time with him…I think that I have fallen hard. It's something very oddly close to love! I know this to be true because the pain is unbearable and there can be no other explanation. My only thought of course is why ERIC! Why did it have to be him. I miss him so much, it feels like a part of me has gone missing. No, not missing but taken from me.

There was a time that I never would have thought that Eric is who would come to mind when I want to feel safe, a sense of security. That is what he came to be, my protector, my friend, my lover and my equal. I can only imagine that this feeling of loss would be felt in the same way that an enfant would surely miss the security of their warm snuggly wrapped blanket.

I am still stretched out across my bed when I notice it is after 3pm. As I try to rid my mind of thoughts of my Eric, my stomach is quite obviously begging to be fed. I drag my butt to the kitchen and make myself some bacon, eggs, toast and put some coffee on. While waiting for the coffee to brew I pour myself some orange juice.

After eating I still feel so out of it that I rinse my dishes and just leave them lying in the sink. It is so quiet I think I could quite literally go insane…his voice is all I hear, whispers in the darkness. _'Lover, Lover, Lover. _I try so hard not to hear the words, but in my head he talks so loud.

I shower and throw on my 2pc pink short pjs and hop into bed…I know I will get through this but right now I am in limbo. I live and I breath but I feel mostly dead inside. I am not even sure I understand these thoughts but I sift through them as I drift off to sleep.

…_his hand is slowly caressing my thigh making it's way to my centre as he places soft kisses across my breasts. Gently nipping at each of my nipples. I feel first one then a second of his long fingers slide between my folds…entering me then slowly backing out to only enter me fully again. He brings his gentle lips to my own sliding his tongue along my lower lip, seeking entrance into my mouth. "Your so beautiful" I tell him pulling my fingers through his hair as he pulls at my nipples with the fingers of his free hand, causing a comfortable warmth to settle between my legs. "Oh, oh god…oh Eric please, please make me come!"_

"Oh god…please" I whisper softly. The feel of his fingers buried deep within my core is such a turn on. It feels so real as I am slowly waking up, coming out of my dream about one of our many nights in front of the fire. I lean up towards his beautiful lips and kiss him passionately, wrapping my hands around his neck. I never want to let him go.

Suddenly I realize that someone is indeed lying next to me, kissing down my neck, smoothing out

my hair with one hand and gently massaging my very wet center through my shorts.

"ERIC!" I shove him away with all my strength, and of course he let's me I couldn't do it on my own.

"What are you doing here and in my bed at that Eric…what the hell!"

"I was just here to check up on you, there was no answer so I came in. I could sense you here and was concerned. I can't help that you began to ask me to make you come Sookie.'

Oh god…I am so embarrassed. Did I seriously say that out loud! Still he knew I was sleeping.

"Eric…" I groaned

"Sookie" He murmurs while licking down my neck…"if you want this conversation to take place without the sex we will have to leave this room. I can hardly be expected to control myself while you are so wet for me!"

"Eric, please. Get off my bed and out of my room! Scoot, go to the living room I will be right out."

I had to take a few moments to calm down I mean crap I just woke up to Eric fondling me while dreaming about him doing just that…what the hell right? What am I suppose to do with that? I went into the bathroom and splashed some cold water on my face. I can't believe he is even here already, I haven't had enough time to sort through everything.

When I entered the living room Eric was just standing there staring into the fire he must have built for me. He seemed to be lost in thought if that is even possible for a vampire. I decided to get right to the point, I would like nothing more then to hop right back in bed where I have been all day!

"Why are you here Eric? What do you want now? I demanded

"Sookie, you seem unhappy with me, has something happened?" His eyes sparkled as he spoke as though he were hiding something. Which he normally is, so no big deal there.

"I am fine Eric. It's just I would imagine you have plenty you should be doing as opposed to entering my home and my bed, uninvited I might add. Not to mention touching me while I sleep. Do you have no morals?"

I could feel the anger building which also left me confused. I would like nothing more then to have him again…all of him, but at the same time it hurts too much to see him. Well, this Eric so soon.

He laughed, that laugh that I can't imagine not hearing every day again! He'll never understand that when he left me he took a piece of me with him, and I feel as though I will never be whole again.

"Morals" He said "You were begging me to make you come, Sookie. Sleeping or not those words left your mouth. Now, I would like to talk about my stay here. So many things have happened, I have wanted to touch y…"

"Enough Eric, that person was not you. You were not yourself or it would never have happened!" My voice was beginning to rise a little and I wanted to cry. Of course he will not see me break down.

"I will not let this go Sookie. You do not have to say much today, but I will get this off my chest. I have wanted you to yield to me for quite some time, it drives me mad that you can do so when as you say I was not me. I will have you know that was me, just another part of me the part that did not know how much protection needed to be in place for survival purposes. Mine and others, including yours. I would not have existed for as long as I have without the shell you know me to normally carry."

He seemed to hesitate before going on. I took the opportunity to offer him a blood which he declined and I took a seat on the couch. He continued to stand and pace somewhat.

"I, well we shared something that I never would have thought was possible for me ever. I still don't know how I feel about it, it's very strange for me to have these…uh feel…memories of us I guess is what I mean."

"Eric you know yourself better then anyone you know that what happened never would have, at least not to the extent that it did if you were you…there is nothing there for either of us. Please just let it go." I was begging now and I knew it.

He started to walk towards me so I stood up. He grabbed onto my arms a little roughly and planted the mother of all kisses on me. There was no fight for dominance he just took over, for a moment I just stood there not reacting. Well not that he could see anyway, but I was drowning here. Barely able to keep my head above water.

My mind was saying no, no, no! My body on the other hand had a mind of it's own, and was silently chanting yes, yes, god yes! My lips finally caught up with the moment and my mouth began to move with his. My tongue searching his mouth and sliding across his fangs, not forgetting what that does to him.

He groans into my mouth while whispering one word, _Lover. _That one word stops me dead in my tracks, and my body stiffens. His whispered words haunt me. He pulls away from me, and places two fingers under my chin to gently raise my face.

"Look at me" He demanded "This is right Sookie, you know it is. I want this. You want this." He traced his finger tips down my blushed cheeks as says…" This tells me what I want to know and this…and this" He says while running his hand first across my chest gently squeezing my hardened nipple and ever so slowly (giving me the chance to stop him) sliding his hand under my 'short' shorts and rubbing against exceptionally wet centre.

A soft moan escaped my mouth and I couldn't stop myself. I lunged at Eric throwing my arms around his neck, pulling at his hair while I practically crawled up his body. I started nipping and sucking at his lower lip. For once I think I caught him off guard because he froze briefly before taking a fist full of my hair and pulling my head back.

His eyes so full of lust captured mine as his husky sex filled voice whispered "Say it! I want to hear you say it!" I groaned internally as I felt the heat pouring from my hot centre. "Fuck me Eric…please I want you to fuck me now!"

I reached down and roughly palmed his 'gracious plenty' and heard him grunt a whispered "Fuck" as he tore at my clothes we were both naked instantly. Within seconds he had me bent over the back of the old chair in front of the fire. He thrust forcefully into me, one hand on my hip and the other cupping my chin as he pulled me up slightly finding just the right angle.

There was nothing slow or romantic about this exchange it was raw, frantic and pure animalistic passion. He was reaching deeper and deeper with each thrust, slamming against me harder and faster. "Fuck , your so hot lover. Come with me!"

"Oh god Eric…don't stop, please don't stop! Yes, yes, yes…I'm almost there! God yes…bite me now Eric please! Aahhh!" He leaned in against my back and bit into my shoulder taking a long draw of my blood before driving into me with one final thrust. We went over the edge together always in sync.

He finished off yelling out in his beautiful native tongue, words I do not understand. He leaned over and lazily licked at the bite marks on my shoulder before pulling out of me. The instant he withdrew his length me I felt that same emptiness take over me.

I was still leaning over the chair my chest heaving, trying to catch my breath when he gently turned me around. His lips ghosted across mine, planting one of his rather sweet kisses on me before backing away to retrieve his clothing.

We got dressed in silence, both sneaking the occasional glance at one another. I brushed past him at the entry way to the kitchen, not able to look at him again. He just stood there with his shoulder leaning against the doorframe watching me drink my orange juice.

One of us had to break the silence and it certainly wasn't going to be me. I think Eric felt that same way. He just walked across the room used both hands to cup my face and gently kissed my lips before turning and walking out the door.

I was heart broken. I know his memory loss was not his fault, the fact that he was a different person and the things that happened between us were also not his fault. It didn't make a difference somehow I still expected that it should have been him to break the silence. I mean it was him that changed, not me!

I curled up in a ball in the centre of my bed and cried myself to sleep one more time. It would be over a week before I received any word from him again, and even that was from Pam!

***I do not own any rights to these characters they solely belong to Charlaine Harris***


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: WARNING: Not all will be too happy with this chapter…poor Eric…lol! Keep reviewing I love everyone's take on it. **

**In Thy Lovers Arms**

**Eric POV**

After tonight I feel as though I am fully understanding the extent of the feelings Sookie and I have come to feel for one another. I had already come to a close enough conclusion prior to our actions this evening, but when the full extent came crashing down on me I had no clue what to do.

All I could do was stare at her and wonder how this woman came to mean so much to me. How had she broken through. I have a spent a thousand years never feeling, not really anyway. I never expected to ever love, partly believing we as vampires were just not capable. I wonder now how I ever thought that, I mean if I am capable of anger, lust and hatred among other emotions…why not love?

I lay here alone, thinking of her, wanting to be near her. Her soft flesh, her inviting smile all while her scent surrounds me. My body is covered in it and I cuddle, yes! I said it cuddling her pillow. What fun Pam would have with this and what she wouldn't give to see it. I chuckle to myself at that thought. She never will.

I almost turned back at least six times when I left her tonight. Her pain was unbearable, it crushed my still heart but what am I to do. She won't talk to me about us, her actions tonight shocked the hell out of me. She wanted me as much as I wanted her!

I honestly don't know who has it worse…based on that look in her eyes I would say her. It's hard to say would I rather have every memory and know what I have lost as appears to be the case with her, or go mad caring, wanting and loving with no memory of why, what or how. Just the knowledge of the fact that I would gladly die my final death for her…and then I am back to why?

To make matters worse the loss of memory alone is un-fucking-acceptable for all my years of existence there is not one gap, not until our time together.

It doesn't help that everything I think I know and feel is true. I mean when I spoke of her yielding to me and sharing feelings, she never even attempted to deny any of it. Well the feeling I guess she can't hide with the bond we share but she never even flinched when I spoke of the sex. Nor has she bothered to inquire about when I became ME again.

I had fully intended to lay it all out there for her, the only way to move ahead here is with full disclosure. By both of us, as much as I knew she would not like that the curse had been broken at a very inopportune time for her. It didn't occur to me that this could be a deal breaker with her as Pam says this Dear Abby would say. I mean she was the one that was on her back and very obviously allowing me to taste her and she wanted me, oh yes she did indeed!

She hides things from me too. She must feel my confusion and pain as well as I feel hers, and yet she refuses to at least and make me see how we got to be here. What changed for her or in her, I might have been a little different in personality as Pam has explained but Sookie she was still Sookie.

**Eric POV~ 2 Nights Later**

I had needed these last couple of nights to reflect and so did she, we were both hurting for different reasons but either way the same effect was had. They were the hardest two days of my existence. I had decided to go to her and beg her to see me, the real me. I no longer cared about why or how, hell I had wanted Sookie from the moment I first saw her. She was bright, sexy, charming, innocent and beautiful. Of course I would love her!

The consequences could be dire and I must make sure she knows this. To be with me, to love me can be a danger to her. To us both, she will hate it when I say this but she weakens me or at least is my weakness and soon enough many will know it. I will only tell her truths tonight as I always have until that night. To give her my love is to give her my life.

What happened next was nothing I had expected and I couldn't believe that I had planned to not only ask her to be mine, but also offer myself to her completely . I didn't want her as a pet or a piece of property as most vampires take a human. I wanted to love and be loved as equals.

I flew to her home to save myself some time. Sookie was just returning home and was with a male companion. I was certainly not happy but kept my distance and intended to wait for him to leave. I watched as they approached her front door and then as she turned to say good night. I also watched as he leaned forward and placed a kiss on her lips and as her hands rested on his shoulders.

I couldn't watch anymore! The way I seen it I had two choices approach them and I would surely cause hurt him much pain if not kill him. Or walk away. I chose to walk away, at that moment I realized my mistake. I had forgotten that the reason we vampires felt superior to humans was because we were! When we pledge our loyalty, you have it. When we give our word, it is guaranteed and when if I were to have her my love and my heart for all eternity in exchange for one thing, hers.

You can not say the same for humans. They are disloyal, and will turn there back on you in a heart beat. They will claim to love you but be with another, and their word often means nothing!

She would have had it all, anything and everything there was nothing I would have denied her. We would have been one 'Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies' that is what we were to me until this very moment. I may walk among the undead but it is she who is dead to me now!

*************************

I was back in my office at Fangtasia and I was livid. 'Two days, two fucking days!' I slammed my fist down on my desk. 'fucking humans'

"Pam, bring me a fucking royal!"

"Are we celebrating tonight Eric."

"Does it look like it Pamela?"

"I suppose not when you put it like that, but just so you know we have Six beautiful woman downstairs all untouched! We are partaking in one of our long overdue orgy's and you are of course always welcome to join."

I didn't have to think twice. I am no fool and do not belong to anyone, certainly not anyone that would shame herself and me so quickly. I never saw my Sookie that way, she was pure and innocent. Now, well she is no better then one of those blood bags out in the bar.

"You know I think I will Pam, it has been too long since we partook in such pleasures!"

The rest of the evening went as planned, I fully enjoyed myself with four of the lovely ladies in question. I could easily have had all six but I do not take part in sloppy seconds as they call them and I had to be kind enough to allow Pam and Chow one each until I was at least partially sated.

It's funny how the only two times that I have full recollection of being with Sookie she was able to satisfy me. Even after all four of these woman it was not enough, and I had licked, sucked and fucked and been sucked. It's also funny that I would allow myself to give her any thought at this moment.

First I had been sucked off by Jill as I licked and sucked at Meagan while Stacey and Lori got each other ready for me. Then as I fucked Stacey, Lori continued to sit at her face being licked. While Meagan was doing what some would call unspeakable things at my rear end, she was a kinky one, as Jill sprawled out in front of me pleasuring herself. We switched it up many times until I had had my fill of every one of them.

I find myself alone in my bed again wondering the hell I think I am kidding. It is going to be much harder then I thought to rid myself of thoughts of her. When I first entered my bed I tossed her pillow into a corner only to find myself standing in that same corner, sniffing at her pillow and trying to take in her scent again. Then shamefully placing it back on my bed.

**Sookie POV**

Even as my heart was breaking, I knew this was better. I had to make myself get over Eric. I love him, I do but what kind of life can I really have with him? Sometimes it doesn't matter when I think about him because I realize that I don't care about the dangers I just want to be with him. Then I remember that it is not really him, he is not 'my Eric' anymore.

But he looks and feels like 'my Eric' and he laughs like 'my Eric'. He even looks at me like 'my Eric' and he kisses me like 'my Eric' and even took me over the back of my chair like 'my Eric'. Who am I kidding anyway he is 'MY ERIC'. He is that part of me that is missing with out it I am not whole, and I want very much to be whole again!

I tried my best to forget him last night, it had been two days since he fucked me and walked out without a word. He made me feel dirty and used it didn't matter to me that I had been the one to jump him or that I also had chosen to stand there and not say a word. Hell I barely even looked at him.

When I say I tried my best I mean I tried for all of about ten minutes. I had gone to school with Quin and he no longer lives in town/ He was visiting family and called to see if I would go to dinner and catch up. I said fine knowing it would be nice to get out of the house.

When he brought me home I guess he just thought it wouldn't hurt to try and he kissed me. I was hurting so much and I missed Eric. I thought maybe since he had me for the first time since his memory returned that I just wasn't enough. Sure he kissed me good bye but he use to do that sometimes anyway if he could sneak it in.

Quin had kissed me at the door and I lead him into my house. We kissed and explored each other for a few minutes. In those few minutes we had undressed each other he was instantly hard and although he only briefly slid his fingers into me I rushed him past this part it just felt too intimate.

By the time I realized how much I didn't want this he was nearly finished, it was that quick. So I just let him finish and swore up and down I would avoid any future contact with him. I am a horrible person, here I am letting an old friend (using the term friend loosely) have his way with me. When only two days ago I was with someone I love. There was definitely no comparison.

Once Quin was finished I asked him to leave and once again found myself curled up on my bed crying myself to sleep. This time not only sad and broken but ashamed and disgusted by my actions. I couldn't blame Eric for not wanting me now.

**It seemed to start out so well for Eric…but he was hurt and is a Vampire after all. They love to have their fun! **

******These characters are the property of Charlaine Harris******


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Just wanted to take a moment to clear something up. Some of you wonderful readers have wondered why Eric seems so harsh at times. I guess it was more clear in my head that he was also a victim but would certainly never play the part. Regardless, he is prideful, confused and somewhat angry. The way I have viewed the scenario is that he is as we all know over 1000 years old and never let a human touch him as Sookie has. That alone would have rocked him but to return to himself, having no memory of recent events and such a strong change to his emotional state involving Sookie. He is just processing in his own way. He has wanted Sookie for a long time as we know and can not understand how she wanted him 'broken' but not as the strong powerhouse of a man/vamp that he is.

Not sure if that helps at all…but I just thought I would explain a little of his mind set. Not to worry though I have faith that Eric is and will be who and what most of us want him to be!

In Thy Lovers Arms

Eric POV

**It has been four days since I seen Sookie outside of her house with her 'friend'. Every night I have thought about going to her. I try to convince myself that I am only wanting to go because I still have her damn check and I am sure she can use the money. **

**I just can not bring myself to go. She obviously does not want me, I guess that should have been obvious. She had always turned me down before why would have thought it would be any different after. The most difficult part of this will be the bond, for me anyway. She doesn't understand the bond just yet we have never fully discussed it.**

**Pam has given me a hard time and says this needs to be settled as I have not been good for business. She says I must go to her, but she is the one refusing to speak. **

"**Pam, what will you have me do? Put myself at the feet of a human and beg her to talk to me? To hear me? Is that what you will have your master do Pam?"**

"**Well it wouldn't be the first, you liked being at her feet before. There were no complaints from you!"**

"**Mind your tongue Pamela"**

"**Eric, you are not happy. The two of you have always pushed each others buttons easily but when it matters you are there for each other. Even when you were not yourself where did you go? Who did you seek out?" **

"**Do not speak of things that you do not understand Pam" Pam is the one pushing my buttons now, and she knows it.**

"**What's to understand? You care for her, you love her and have for a long time. Even if you choose not to see it. She makes you happy and you make her happy, I see it every time you are together…go to her Eric." I sit staring at the wall across from desk trying make my own sense of it all but I just can't.**

"**I can't Pam, I just…can't" It's a simple statement and she knows to leave it be. "Here, make sure Sookie gets this. It is her payment for keeping me…safe." I say and hand her the check.**

**Sookie POV**

I woke up this morning feeling like a brand new woman. I had slept like the dead last night, never even waking to use the washroom. I had realized something while drifting off last night. I am Sookie Stackhouse, I am my own woman and I do not depend on any man for anything.

Part of me feels bad for sending Quinn away so abruptly last night, the only excuse I have is that he has always been a real ladies man and has never had any interest in settling down. I doubt it would have been any different with me.

I still do not really understand how I had let it happen. I can only say that I was like a mad woman, my emotional state all over the place. I felt calm and happy, then angry and sad. Plus I felt wanted and needed and then I felt hateful and guilty. Guilty of course because of Eric.

Yes I fell in love with Eric, But I have loved and lost long before him and I am still here. If I was able to survive the loss of both my parents years ago. Not to mention my Gran much more recently and she had been my rock, Well I could certainly survive this loss. At least he is still alive, well as alive as any vampire can be.

I guess I have forgotten that prior to this whole fiasco, Eric and I had started to become friends in an odd way. Yes he made lewd comments towards me often. Definitely tried on numerous occasions to get me into bed and more often then not scared off any man showing an interest in me. He was also always there for me any time I needed him.

That was when I decided that if nothing else I wanted everything to just go back to the way it was. For the most part I know this probably will not happen but I can always hope right? Eric is even more proud then me so I don't expect he will come to me any time soon. He tried to talk to me and I basically told him to go away, then jumped him. I am sure he is as frustrated with me as I am with him.

We have a connection and a bond that neither can deny. This alone tells me that sometime soon we will get past this. He will come around whether just to see me or on 'Business' as he likes to call it and when he does I will tell him whatever he wants to know.

More days passed and it has been over a week since I have seen or heard from Eric. I go through each day in a robotic state. Wake up, go to work, come home, shower, go to bed. Sometimes I stop for a couple of things at the grocery store or watch a little TV. It turns out that the new me only lasted for all of one day. I am still ok but I really really miss Eric and I think about him constantly.

I worked the dinner shift today and returned home after 8:00pm. I smell of fried foods and alcohol so I quickly hop in the shower. The warm water is so relaxing and it starts me remembering back to my first shower with Eric.

God, I can almost feel his long fingers as they gently parted my lower lips. While he licked and placed open mouthed kisses along my breasts…my hand slowly slides down my stomach and gently grazes my already throbbing mound…"shit, damn cell phones" I mumble to myself as I hop out of the shower grabbing a towel and reaching for my phone.

"Oh god, Fangtasia! Shit, crap!…Hello?" A strangled breath escapes my lips.

"Sookie, darling is everything ok? You sound winded. I wasn't interrupting anything was I?" It was Pam. I silently thanked the good lord, I think I would have passed out if it were Eric. My heart was pounding so hard I thought it would beat right out of my chest.

I was so relieved that I didn't even care that I was well aware of what Pam was getting at. She was hinting that maybe I had someone here. That I was 'busy' with. "No Pam, I was just getting out of the shower and ran for the phone that's all. What can I do for you?"

"Oh it's no big deal really, I just need to see if you are available to come to Fangtasia tomorrow night?" She asked.

"Are you asking or telling Pam?"

"Asking of course Sookie, I would never dream of 'telling' my master's bonded anything."

"hmph" I grunted at her "Give it up Pam! I don't think your 'master' is too worried about who is asking or telling me anything."

"I think you might be surprised at Eric's reaction if he thought that someone may be 'telling' you that you had to do anything you may not want to."

"Pam, I really do not know what you are getting at, I have not heard from Eric in over a week. I highly doubt that I would be his first priority regardless of the situation, but yes if you require me to stop by that will be fine. I have the day off so it is no problem."

"Great! Would 10:00 be good for you Sookie?"

"That's fine, I will see there. Oh wait. Would you mind telling me what this is about?"

"I have to go Sookie, but I will fill you in as soon as you get here…ok?"

"Ok, bye Pam"

"Bye"

So this is it! Tomorrow night I will see Eric again. We can hopefully put this whole thing behind us and just get back to normal. I miss hearing from him every day or two, even when he would just call to say hi. Checking up on me…he would say.

I will just be happy to have this week finally over, it has definitely been one hell of an emotional roller coaster. I am up and down, hot and then cold! Well I am putting an end to it tomorrow night regardless of what Eric need me for.

**A/N: I don't know about you but I can not wait for Sookie and Eric to finally see one another!**

******All characters belong to Charlaine Harris******


	10. Chapter 10

**In Thy Lovers Arms**

**Eric Pov**

I know one thing for sure Pam is definitely walking a very fine line right now. What she was thinking trying to set up a meeting between myself and Sookie without my knowledge I have no idea. I think back to her entering my office not an hour ago.

"How was your rest today, master?" She had asked me.

"The same as any other Pam" I responded.

I know my child and this ridiculous question is only being asked as she attempts to figure out how she will approach whatever it is she truly wishes to discuss with me.

"Were you able to consider our conversation from last evening?"

Ah, so she has just decided to jump in full force. "There is nothing to consider, were you under the impression that I was somehow not sure of my own decision Pam?"

"No Eric, I just thought you would see what needs to be done. I think you owe it to her to at least talk. She is willing now, will you turn her away?"

"If she chose to come to me I would talk to her of course."

"Well as luck would have she will be here shortly for this." She tells me placing that damn check back on my desk.

"PAM, what is the meaning of this? Have you gone against me again? You were told to get that to her."

"And I have Master, you did not say how to ensure that she received the check just that I she does. So I have called her and asked to come to you, she will receive her payment is this not what you wanted ?" I see I am Master again and the smirk she is attempting to hide let's me know that of course she knows exactly what she is doing.

"When will she come?"

"10:00 tonight."

"Fine. Leave and know this is not the last on this subject."

I have less then an hour before Sookie will be here, I am unsure if this should take place in my office or out in the bar. I think we may need privacy, I really hate when she acts out and I am sure she will.

**Sookie POV**

I have been on edge from the moment I woke up. Part of me does not know why I am so nervous, Eric has always been good to me for the most part. Even when I would stand up to him he was kind enough, mind you in some disgusting form of logic I think it did something for him sexually.

There was a time that I felt I would rather die then be with Eric, now I am not the least bit sorry that I went to bed with him, or that I fell in love with him. I just want to get past this, that's all. Move on without all the hurt if that's even possible.

As I approached the front doors to Fangtasia I seen Pam waving me forward.

"Hey Pam, how are you?"

"Good, good I am just glad you came."

"So what is this all about?"

"Well I know Eric has your check and I assume you two will want to talk."

"How has he been, is he in a decent mood today?"

"I have not seen him much but I hope he is."

"Not very promising Pam, is he in his office?"

"Yes, go ahead he is expecting you."

"Thanks, wish me luck" I laughed a little, somehow it came out a somewhat strangled which was not my intention.

I made my way through the bar it was not too busy as of yet. I am still rather disgusted by the look of most of the fangbangers, I do not know how they are even appealing. Especially to someone as hot as Eric, it really bothers me to think of what he may do with some of these people.

I make my way through the employee only door towards Eric's office and I can hear his voice, it is obvious he is on the phone as there is no response to his words. It sounds like he may be going out of town.

I tap lightly on the open door so he knows I am here. He gestured for me to come in and I notice he doesn't look overly angry or agitated. Maybe things will go smoothly. He continues his conversation but slides something towards me on his desk.

When I pick it up I see it is a check, my payment for letting him stay at my house. He nods at me like he is dismissing me. Well I'm not going anywhere so I just shake my head telling him no. He cocks that eyebrow at me and I take a seat in the chair in front of his desk.

He maintained his conversation for a couple of minutes, I am sure this was to make sure I was aware that he was not at my beck and call. Makes no sense to me as he called me here not the other way around. I just happen to want to end all the crap.

"Was there something else Sookie?"

"As a matter fact there is Eric. I don't want to do this anymore, can't we just talk about this…this whatever this is that is going on."

"I don't have time for this, I am a busy man Sookie"

"Eric, please I am trying here…do you know how hard this is?"

"Sookie I have tried this already and you only seem intent on keeping things from me, things I need to know. It's frustrating to know that my feelings are…stronger towards you and yet not have the knowledge of why?"

"I know and I have just decided that I want to be honest with you, as you have always been with me. I will answer your questions I only ask that we both lay all our cards on the table. I want to know why I have not heard from you, why did you walk out on me without a word. Not one Eric!"

"You will tell me everything? Leave nothing out?"

"Yes"

"Why will you do this now, what has changed?"

"Nothing has changed Eric, I was just afraid."

"What were you afraid of, Sookie?"

"I, I don't know really. I guess I was afraid of everything that allowing an us to be, would actually mean for me, for you…and I guess for us but now I'm just afraid of losing you. We were…friends before this, well sort of and I miss that."

"So you want to be my friend, Sookie?" His eyes were dead, for lack of a better word as he spoke.

"Eric, I just don't want to play anymore games I…you, you really did hurt me with the way you left the last time we were together."

"I find that hard to believe, you seem to be doing just fine…" I was beginning to feel a little frustrated and cut Eric off.

"Fine, fine! How am I fine Eric? I'm miserable I can't sleep without dreaming about you, I can't be awake without thinking about you, I can barely eat properly and I cry constantly…look obviously this doesn't even matter to you. Just ask what you want so I can go."

"I want for you to know that it matters to me Sookie, I have no idea why because you make me so fucking angry but it matters…it matters enough to me that I came to see you two nights after we last talked. I didn't want to be away from you anymore"

He stopped speaking I'm sure as he took in the look on my face which I know was a cross between shock, guilt, horror, shame. It had taken me a moment to piece it together, to remember what I had been doing that night…Quinn.

"Ah, so you know which night I am speaking of?" Sheriff Eric was coming out full force with his condescending, hateful tone.

"Eric, I…"

"You what? You want to work things out, talk? Be honest with me all of a sudden?"

"Yes" I whispered "I came here for that purpose."

"You came here for a check, don't kid yourself or me for that matter."

God, he knows about Quinn. I wasn't planning on hiding it when I decided to be open and honest in hopes of being together, I had planned to tell him everything maybe not all today but I did plan on telling him.

"Not just the money Eric, I had intended to have this conversation with you regardless. I miss yo…"

I had been cut off by a knock on the door and Eric calling out for them to enter.

"What do you need?" He snapped.

"Chow asked me to remind you that he was leaving early tonight."

Though she was thinking something entirely different like how fucking hot Eric was and she was so happy to have lost her virginity to him last week, she was hopeful that it would happen again since they have kept her around.

Needless to say I was pissed, here he was about to lay into me over Quinn and he was still fucking and drinking from the damn fangbangers!

"Thank you, Jill. Tell him that is fine."

"Fucking hypocrite" I mumbled and Eric's head snapped back to me, I didn't care that he must have heard me.

I was up and on my feet, half way out the door before I even realised that I had moved. "I have to go, I have plans but we'll talk later if your still interested in knowing anything." I spat at him.

He was on his feet and at my side in seconds grasping my arm.

"Wait Sookie."

I attempted to rip my arm from his grasp but he hadn't let go.

"Eric please…just don't." I tried to glare up at him but he clearly registered something different in my eyes and released my arm.

I once again drove home fighting back the tears I knew would soon follow.

_I hate him, I fucking hate him!_

I dropped my purse and removed my shoes before stripping down to nothing and climbing into bed, I didn't even have the energy to care that I was alone and naked in my bed.

I tossed and turned for a while before I heard someone knocking at my door, I had a pretty good feeling that it was Eric and was almost tempted to answer the door as I was. Let him see what he'll never have again.

But I didn't. I quickly grabbed my robe and threw it on as I made my way through my house to the front door.

**Eric POV**

I was angry both with Sookie and myself, not to mention this fucking fangbanger that Chow seemed to take a liking to and wanted to keep around for a while.

I don't know what I was thinking saying that I didn't fucking care if he did, she had obviously been thinking about our time together during the orgy last week and now Sookie was livid.

Livid and dare I say hurt…I am almost positive hurt is was I was feeling and seeing in those beautiful eyes.

I had no choice but to let her go we would only argue, exchange hurtful words and I had no intention of doing that here.

I quickly put away what I had been working on and let Pam know I was leaving.

"Pam, I am leaving for the night. Jill has to go, permanently, Chow can see her all he wants but not here make sure he knows this."

"Yes, Eric. Is everything ok?"

"No, but I'm going to deal with it now once and for all."

She didn't respond as I left through the back entrance, I hopped in my car choosing to drive to Bon Temps. It would give me time to figure out what needs to be said between us.

I knocked loudly when I arrived at Sookie's and was surprised to find her half naked as she opened her door.

"What do you want, Eric?"

"We need to talk."

She glared at me momentarily before stepping back and allowing me to enter.

"I told you we would talk later why must you always have things your way?"

"It is later, I'm not here to argue. I want the truth you offered me and in turn will be truthful with you."

I stepped forward placing the palm of my hand on her cheek.

"I would like to stary by saying that I am sorry and that I do truly hate that I have hurt you."

**A/N: Welcome back to those of you still following the story after so long, thank you! Next chapter will of course finally be their long awaited conversation where truths will be told. **

*****As always they all belong to Charlaine Harris*****


	11. Chapter 11

**Sookie POV:**

As cool as his skin was to the touch it felt like he was pressing fire against my own skin as his hand gently cupped my cheek.

"I would like to start by saying that I am sorry and that I do truly detest the fact that I have hurt you."

I brought my own hand to cover his as I allowed my eyes to close for a moment before stepping away from Eric.

"I know, me too." I whispered. "Please come in. Make yourself comfortable, I'll be right back." I told him as I gestured for him to enter the living room.

I knew that I needed to calm down as seeing him at my door only me made that much more… angrier. I needed to splash some cold water on my face and take a moment to just breath.

When I returned to the living room Eric was seated on the far end of the couch, I decided that a little distance is probably better for us and took a seat in the chair across from him.

"Do you know where you'd like to start?" I asked jumping right in.

"You have to tell me what happened. Everything, from the beginning. I already know from Pam how I came to be here but of course so much has obviously happened that she nor anyone else is privy to…aside from us that is" He looked at me intently. Searching my eyes for something. Probably truth.

"I hate not knowing what I did, what we've done. I've had a life longer than you can even imagine, some of it good some of it…not and I remember every second of it, except for the time I spent here with you."

"Well for starters I can't make you remember," I said as calmly as I could. "I can only tell you that you stayed with me for several days, we enjoyed each others company, we were…um intimate and then Pam came to get you."

Eric stared into my eyes a little longer. I guess still searching for answers, mine not being satisfactory.

I sucked in a deep unsteady breath and released an even shakier one. It's utterly ridiculous that after everything we have shared that I feel so darn nervous having this conversation with him.

"Eric, I am completely aware that the person you were before as well as now would never have opened up to me the way you did, would never have let me in. I'm sorry that I've not been more forward with you about all this but you have to take a step back and see all of this from my point of view as well."

Eric simply nodded obviously waiting for me to continue.

"I don't know just how much you want to know but I guess the most important part is that I admitted that we were together intimately." He again didn't seem too surprised by this revelation so I quickly added the last part. "quite often really."

"Often?" He questioned as he cocked an eyebrow.

"I, ah. Eric," I said, "we had sex in every room in this house in almost every position I could imagine, and some I couldn't multiple times. You told me it was the best you'd ever had, not that you could honestly remember any other sex but you were very set on making me believe that, making me want to believe it."

I wasn't sure how much more he needed to know but I decided if I was getting this out there then it was damn well going to be all of it. He could do with it what he wanted but at least I could say that I had tried, I had finally reached out to him.

"You were sweet and kind and caring. You wanted to protect me, take care of me. Stay with me."

Eric looked like he'd just taken a pretty serious blow to the head. And I oddly enough felt a little relieved for all of about thirty seconds. Then I began to feel uneasy as his eyes changed, his face took on a closed off, far away look.

"Ah…Is there anything else…you think I should know?" he said in a voice so calm it in no way even remotely resembled what his eyes were trying to convey.

"You offered to give up your position as sheriff, walk away from it all and come to live with me. You said you would get a job if that is what enabled us to stay together safely."

He Hadn't said anything for the better part of ten or more minutes and I was beginning to feel the affects of far too much anxiety flowing through my body. I felt like I could be ill at any moment.

"Please say something Eric, you're the one that wanted to know these things. Believe me I would rather be you and have no knowledge then be me…I get the joy of remembering every little detail, every touch, feeling, emotion and word spoken between us while at the same time living with the fact that you don't remember any of it."

He still never spoke a word but had finally shifted in his seat, leaning forward and wringing his hands together in front of his knees.

"I know it wasn't your doing and it's not your fault but I can't help but feel like it's me sometimes, like I'm just not important enough for you to…want to remember."

"Want to" His silence finally broken "want to? You think I don't want to remember, it's all I fucking think about, my every thought brings me back to you, Sookie! Everything you've told me, yeah it's great to have some of that knowledge but fuck…it still doesn't help me." He angrily ran his hands through his hair.

"Yeah" She scoffed "Please enlighten me, Eric. Have all your whores made you think of me? I admit I made a mistake, I made one mistake thinking if I could move on that I wouldn't have to feel like you ripped my heart out when you left me…AGAIN!"

"Sookie"

"Don't you Sookie me! You want to talk? Well it works both ways. So tell me why, why all those…those women?" I was using the term women, very loosly.

"And don't even try the feeding bullshit with me, you've already told me how little you actually need because of your age. It sickens me, Eric. It makes me sick to even think about it much less see it through her…mind!"

"I, fuck. I can only say I'm sorry, the same as you. Why is it that you can't understand that I too was trying to rid my mind of you?"

"I don't know what else to say. I have an excellent mind for business, acting as Sheriff, and I know exactly how to deal with any other person, human or supe without question. It's you, you're the only being that I have no clue how to be around, fuck…I hate having feelings!

He seemed to take moment to gather himself before he continued.

"Look, Sookie. There's more that you should know." He stated apprehensively.

"We said we'd be honest here so I will. I already knew we had sex Sookie, christ I could smell it, smell both you and me and what was so very obviously the scent of our sex." He hesitated taking an unnecessary breath before continuing.

"I, I know because I had to have come back into my right mind at what could possibly have been the worst possible moment."

"I don't understand." I said quietly.

"Our last night together, I didn't just suddenly remember myself after you drifted off to sleep. It…it happened before, it happened earlier…"

I know I gasped audibly as my mind grasped what he was trying so hard to say.

"When Eric? When?"

He stood now facing the fire and ran his hand over his face, his stance not quite so tall and strong. He looked so torn and confused, he had never looked more human than in that moment.

"During, no. Before the…sex. While I was, we were…fooling around, I guess."

I didn't know what to say, it was me left speechless now.

"I was confused Sookie, I had no idea how or even what the hell was going on. It didn't help when I looked into your eyes…there was something there and it scared the shit out of me because I knew I felt it too. You…I, what have you done to me?"

He turned to me with the most tortured look on his face and I just wanted to hug him but I stayed seated for fear of his rejection, I just couldn't take that right now.

"I'm not me anymore, I mean I am me for the most part but I have these….feelings, strong feelings that drive me insane. I thought that if you told me everything that something would finally click, that it would finally explain why I don't like to be away from you, why I constantly think about you."

"It's the same for me Eric, only I know why I feel the way I do. I am just more afraid of what anything between us would mean for the both of us. Your not the same person yet you are, it confuses the shit out of me."

He stood silently simply nodding his head as I spoke.

"I would willingly give up anything to be with my Eric, the Eric that I spent days on end with here in my home. I have a little trouble being willing to give up all those same things to set up home with Eric Northman, Sheriff of area 5, because that person…"

"You know Sookie, that person is still me. It's quite insulting you act like you're referring to two different people, as confused as I am even I know that."

"No Eric, that person would never make me feel like I was nothing more than a conquest, with the real you I would always be waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under me. I don't trust you, not with my heart. I'd trust you with my life any day but not my heart."

"What are you saying? Is that it, we're just done because you say so?"

"I don't know anymore, I was so ready to be with you no matter what because I miss you, I do but you don't even remember us and you are still having your share of enjoyment with the lovely fangbangers that are constantly at your feet.:

"Only after I seen you with your 'friend', before that I never touched anyone I only wanted you. I wanted you before, during and after losing my memory, you don't find it strange that even with no memory I ended up here? You were the only hold up, tell me why am I ok for you when I am…broken but not when I am ME?"

**Eric POV:**

This woman is infuriating, she can somehow make a 1000 year old Viking Vampire feel inferior.

It doesn't help that none of this conversation has actually answered anything for me, I need to understand how suddenly my own existence, my own safety is not the most important thing to me anymore.

Why I would risk my own life, so to speak, in order to ensure that Sookie is here and safe. Why I feel the need to beg her to come home with me, be with me.

"That's not true Eric, you were never broken not by a long shot. You just didn't have to be so guarded, or in control you were able to let go of the hard exterior for a little while and just be Eric."

I ignored her attempt at stroking my ego, it wasn't necessary.

"I would have been loyal to you, denied you nothing."

"Loyal" She scoffed at me. "Denied me nothing, can you promise to love me Eric, do you even know what love is?"

And just like that I realise that I do love her, I had already come to this conclusion but let my pride and my anger get in the way. Not anymore, this will complicate the shit out of everything but I will not deny it anymore.

"I didn't, not until you."

"What did you say?"

"I said not until you, I keep going back and forth but I'm done second guessing myself. I kept denying it, thinking it wasn't possible and then I realised if I am capable of feeling everything else like anger and hate. Then why not something else…I love you, Sookie."

"No you don't, don't say that! Don't you dare!"

"It's true, I came here to tell you just that the night I saw you here, with him. I might not remember anything but I came to realise that I didn't need to remember in order to feel…and I want to feel again, Sookie."

A sob escaped her lips and she near dropped to the floor as her knees buckled but I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her to me. She cried into my chest for a few moments telling me how sorry she is, for what I don't know.

She finally pulled away from me and I wiped the tears from her beautiful face.

"Say it again " She demanded.

"What?"

"I said say it again."

"I love you, Sookie Stackhouse."

A/N: I have cut it short to get something posted but obviously there is still a little more to the conversation. So we see a softer side to Eric, I know not everyone agrees that there is a softer side to him but to me it was always obvious where Sookie was concerned.

Yes, he takes advantage of certain situations but he is different even if only a little when it comes to her.

A/N: I do not own anything!


End file.
